Teenage stupidity is a growing disease infecting the lives of our teens across the nation. Teenagers forget they can still make good choices, but as parents… it is our duty to raise awareness and ensure that our teens become productive, polite adults. Consider the following statements:
• Making it until your 18th birthday is a privilege not a right.
• It is not child abuse until I bleed you.
• “I’m going to rip off your arm and beat you with the bloody end of it” may not scare you anymore, but taking away your cell phone and Facebook privileges does.
• I may not really have eyes in the back of my head, but I belong to a union of local parental spies. I will find out!
• For multiple children: Telling me your sister had food in the living room DOES constitute a life or death emergency situation, because if you tattle like that again… I am going to kill you.
• Sneaking food isn’t exactly sneaky. I will notice it is missing.
• It is imperative to your health and my freedom that you do the chores I’ve given you.
• I don’t care what your friend’s parents let them do. In this history of parenting this has never mattered and never will.
• Finally, “Because I said so” is my right, and if you’re lucky – someday it will be your right too. If you’re lucky. I mean really, really lucky.
~JLZ~
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